If it seems like these kinds of people don’t pay attention to other people’s feelings, you’re probably right about that. These people might act as if your experiences don’t matter or as if they need to stick theirs on top. Talking about oneself is fine as part of an equal give-and-take, but it’s boring when it’s one-sided. You know, where you say something about yourself or your experience, and they ignore what you say and tell you something vaguely related that calls attention to themselves. It’s just that they may not have any grace or tact in how they do it, so it comes off as arrogance or bragging. Sometimes you might also get the sense that these people want you to know how smart or capable they are – which is a totally normal human impulse, in general. Yet being the one to trumpet the negatives seems to give these folks some kind of satisfaction. Even when that’s true, being harsh about it helps nothing. It may also make people feel blamed or ashamed, as if they’re responsible for the problem. This can be really irritating, right? For one thing, it tends to highlight the negative side of events. They seem critical of not just people’s mistakes but also their misfortune. When something bad happens, these characters seem more interested in pointing out what’s wrong or what could and should have been done differently than comforting anyone or expressing sympathy. Do you know anyone in your workplace who fits this description? Unsympathetic Let’s go over a checklist to establish what we’re dealing with. So yeah, let’s consider a glance in the mirror but not throw any stones (I like my shiny glass abode) as we examine this troubling archetype together. Heck, you may be one of them and need a reality check. Luckily, when you understand people’s personalities, it’s easier to get along with them, even those difficult few. It may be tempting to dismiss them as oddball loners, but that can just increase the disconnection and make things worse for everyone. There can be many flavors of “ugh” from various personality types, but we’re focusing on one stereotype here – those who are so weirdly out of sync that they rub others the wrong way and are difficult to work with. (It’s also important to note that some concerning behaviors can relate to mental illness or personality disorders – things beyond the scope of what we cover.) We’re talking about rarer, statistical-minority stuff, not general type-related behavior. Look, every personality type has a “dark side.” Some people express their personality traits in problematic ways, more so in certain situations. But I’m talking about something else here. Well, I’m going to help you with that, like a soothing mental aromatherapy stick for that headache.Ĭertain personality types don’t put much effort into the social side of the workplace (something I know well, as an Architect – INTJ). You can’t always avoid them, and it’s hard to know how to deal with them appropriately. Do you know someone from work who keeps to themselves, as if they can’t relate to – or don’t care – what’s going on in anyone else’s hearts or heads? People like that can cause headaches at work.
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